22-year-old lets pregnant friend stay at apartment rent-free, friend insists host get rid of beloved cats: 'You need to do something about the cats'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jul 4, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

Pets are more than just pets, they're family. You know this if you've ever had a soul bond with an animal. Once they're in your heart, they're in your heart forever, especially if you're the one taking care of them. You consider them a part of your household unit, and if anyone who comes into your life has a problem with that, don't let the door hit you on the way out. Asking someone to get rid of their pet would be like asking them to sell their little sister. 

Sure, we all tried to do that when she was getting on our nerves, but we didn't really mean it. And we would never do that now. Even for the most "important" house guest who could weasel their way into our homes. Especially if we don't really want those houseguests there in the first place. 

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  • 01

    AITA for not getting rid of my cats for my pregnant best friend?

    Edit: thank you everyone for the suggestions and educational info. I did my best research as soon as I found out Kristy was pregnant and it was a relief to see so many comments concurring. Secondly, I do thankfully have cameras in mostly all spaces in my home, including front and back
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10522340352
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • But that's what happened in this situation when an unlucky cat owner found herself in a stressful situation with an unwanted roommate. After already being kind enough to extend a hand to her friend who was struggling, the friend kept wanting more and more. She eventually had enough and took to the internet for advice. Read on for the story. 

  • 03
    entrances. I truly don't believe Kristy herself would ever harm or put my cat in danger, but I know crazier things have happened so... Last, Kristy is staying at her bfs tonight and we haven't spoken much on the situation. In the little talk we had after her mom left, she was deeply apologetic and did tell
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 04
    me she doesn't mind the cat(s) at all and doesn't feel unsafe. I will be talking to her again tomorrow night about not allowing her mom here given the way she spoke to me and about my animals, and coming up with a more airtight agreement in writing of her living situation here.
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 05
    Throwaway account. I 22F have lived alone since the beginning of this year in a 2b 2bath condo. I have one cat who is my pet, but I also volunteer with a local cat rescue organization. It's fairly often that I temporarily foster cats/kittens anywhere from just 1 night-2 weeks at most, until we clear them to be placed in our shelter, or with another foster, or they are adopted. Usually I take in 1 foster at a time, but at times it's 2 if they're siblings, bonded, etc.
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 06
    Recently this summer, my best friend 'Kristy' 23F moved in with me because she was on very bad/hostile terms with her mom and stepdad who she lived with, and it was safer for her to move out. I of course offered her to stay with me, and shes been in the spare bedroom since. However last month, Kristy found out she's pregnant from her bf. They have a plan to get their own place asap she says, but I truly don't mind if she stays here as long as she needs.
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 07
    Given that she's pregnant, when she told her mom last week, her mom wanted to come over and talk things over. So she came here on Thursday and they talked privately for about 2 hours. When they came out it seemed like it was a good chat and they were more relaxed. But, her mom kinda turned her attention towards me and said "if Kristy's going to be
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 08
    living here, you need to do something about the cats." I asked what she meant, and she mentioned toxoplasmosis, the litter boxes, number of cats here, etc. and started getting an attitude towards me and said "you guys should've thought of this already."
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 09
    I let her know we did actually; and there's an extremely low to no risk of toxoplasmosis. I only have one cat (my own) in the main house, who doesn't go into Kristy's room. Kristy also has 0 obligations or responsibilities for my cats, I let her know that the minute she moved in. All litter boxes are
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 10
    cleaned minimum twice daily, and aren't even anywhere near Kristy. My cats litter box is kept in the garage (she has a cat door) and any foster cats I have are kept in my master bathroom. It's a large bathroom and adapted to be safe for a temporary foster. The only interaction Kristy has is if she happens to be in the living
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 11
    room/hallway/kitchen with my cat at the same time, so contact is extremely limited. I also want to add, all cats I foster are up to date with vaccines, spayed/neutered, and exclusively indoor cats only.
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 12
    After explaining all this to Kristy's mom, I told her that at most I would be willing to possibly limit the fosters I bring in, but I will absolutely not be getting rid of my cat. She told me "well yours is the biggest risk here." ALSO she tried to suggest that I should stop volunteering with cats altogether until Kristy moved out or until the baby is born. Kristy tried
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 13
    interrupting her mom to calm down because she kept going on about how I'm being selfish, I'm not realizing that she's carrying another life now, not considering the risks, etc. but given their relationship, she was very on edge with her mom which I understand.
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 14
    I love my best friend, but I will not be getting rid of my pet in my own home that was here before she was. I'm willing to adapt and limit fosters, but I genuinely do not think I'm risking anyone's health here and don't want to stop volunteering. AITA?
    via u/This-Guidance-9105
  • 15
    11 11 1PM
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 16

    Commenters came to her defense.

    sickofdriving007 NTA. As long as she's not scooping the litter boxes she should be fine. If her mom is so concerned maybe she should step up and be a better parent to her daughter so she can live with her.
    via u/sickofdriving007
  • 17
    TheSannens NTA, your house, your cat. Her baby is not your responsibility AND as long as she stays away from the litter box she's fine. Sincerely, A pregnant woman whose indoor cat is currently sleeping on her lap
    via u/TheSannens
  • 18
    [deleted] • 8mo ago NTA. Plenty of pregnant women live with cats and are just fine. I suspect Kristy's mom is doing this to pressure her to move back home, where she can then have more control over her daughter.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 19
    [deleted] NTA. You don't want to get rid of the cats. Kristy doesn't want you to get rid of the cats. This is a non-issue. If Kristy has such a toxic relationship with her mom, her mom should not be coming to your house. Let Kristy go to hers if she can't go NC.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 20
    Individual_Ad_9213 NTA: MOM: "if Kristy's going to be living here, you need to do something about the cats [i.e., you need to get rid of them." OP's anwer should have been: "Well, I guess that Kristy's moving back home with you."
    via u/Individual_Ad_9213
  • 21
    You're doing her a favor by letting her crash at your place. You are under no obligation to do any more. == Kristy and her mom are being presumptuous.
    via u/Individual_Ad_9213
  • 22
    [deleted] NTA. Ignore Kristy's mom she doesn't know what she is talking about. If you are going to limit anything in YOUR home it should be to limit Kristy's mom visitation.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 23
    W... NTA. Cats were there first. Kirsty's Mom was so toxic that Kirsty had to move out. Seems to me that Kirsty's Mom is just trying to stir sh. Maybe tell Kristy's Mom if she actually acted like a Mom her daughter wouldn't have had to have moved out in the first place.
    via u/Waste_Worker6122
  • 24
    StAlvis NTA Kristy's fetus is not your concern. If Kristy's mom is this worried, she's free to secure alternate housing for her daughter.
    via u/StAlvis
  • 25
    T_G_A_H NTA. They should talk to a vet for reassurance. There's no risk unless she is scooping the litter boxes and had direct contact with cat feces. Many pregnant women live with cats.
    via u/T_G_A_H
  • 26
    icecreampe Did you consider saying "get the f out of my house and don't come back" to this woman? Who the f she think she is? NTA. does
    via u/icecreampe
  • 27
    Euphoric_Egg_4198 NTA but you need to have a talk with Kristy and give her a timeline to move out. You're being naive that things won't blow up in your face if she stays any longer.
    via u/Euphoric_Egg_4198
  • 28
    I'm guessing Kristy couldn't afford moving out on her own so she had to move in with you? What makes you think she's going to be able to afford to move out with her BF now that she's pregnant and she'll have to stop working in a few months? Kids are very expensive.
    via u/Euphoric_Egg_4198
  • 29
    If you let her stay too long the boyfriend is going to start coming in and intruding on your space and you'll be the third wheel in your home. Forget about waiting until the baby is born, you'll regret it when you're trying to sleep and there's a baby crying 24/7. Then come the sad
    via u/Euphoric_Egg_4198
  • 30
    stories, she can't afford to move out because she's postpartum. Then she can't afford to move out because she needs to find childcare to get a job. Then she can't move out became childcare is too expensive and she can't afford her own place and childcare. The excuses will be endless and you'll be stuck living with Kristy and the family she chose to create when she couldn't afford it.
    via u/Euphoric_Egg_4198

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childcare Babies aita infant kids bad roommates moms parenting cat parents cute kids pregnant reddit thread parent Reddit roommates raising kids Cats Parenting Fail parents children Parenting FAILS
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